I Took a Nap Today
by Sharon Tjaden-Burkes
I don’t think I can overstate the importance of this title.
Guys, listen up: I took a nap today.
I’m not exaggerating when I say that I have been going, going, going since Monday, March 28th. It’s my own damn fault for saying yes to too many good opportunities to develop my career and my writing. Everything just kind of converged into one hot, continuous mess for the past three weeks. As I mentioned in a previous post, I knew I would feel better once I had gotten past these last few weeks, but I’ve forgotten how wonderful sleep can feel when you’ve been going and going and going for weeks on end.
As I’ve been planning and traveling and conferencing and networking and teaching and grading and mothering, I’ve realized that a huge source of stress comes from my introverted nature.
As an introvert, I’m happiest when I have time to process an experience. I thrive on having a bit of downtime to make sense of conversations with people I’ve just met or interesting presentations that sparked an idea. I like the experience, but I also like the time to process. And now that I’m a mother, all that time that I used to have within my reach to power down and process… It’s pretty much gone.
My thinking is now done in the car. On the way to work. On the way to daycare.
It’s done in the shower.
It’s done during that blessed hour or so of nap time on the weekends. (How will I survive when she drops her nap? What will I do when we have two kids? Thoughts for another time I guess.)
Parenting when you’re an introvert feels like you’re constantly trying to come up for air before you’re pushed down under the current again. And as an artist, I’m especially prone to feeling this way, as Kim Brooks explains in her fantastic essay, “Portrait of the Artist as a Young Mom.”
Today, I’m breathing deep. Grateful for the air. And ready to keep on going.
Becoming Mother 
I’ve never thought of how it would be different to parent if I were an introvert (I am the most extroverted person I’ve ever met in my entire life!) I kind of thrive on the chaos that exists as a Momma with 4 kids. But that is energizing for me, not depleting. I will have the opposite issue from you, but it will hit as my kids grow and leave the nest. I’ve already considered how challenging THAT will be for me as an extrovert! Glad you got to nap and recharge! I will have to start running a Zumba class or something in my 60s! HAH!
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On some days, I really wish I were born an extrovert, but hey, you have to love who you are. 🙂 I put on the “extrovert face” for work so well that I’ve fooled some of my colleagues into thinking I’m an extrovert. But really, I’m so tired at the end of a day of teaching and talking. I also present fairly regularly at conferences–but I plan like crazy and over-prepare so I’m less nervous. Motherhood has really tempered me though. I’m much more willing to “wing it” these days in the areas where I feel at least slightly in my realm. 🙂
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Thanks for this great post. Luckily, my daughter has always been a pretty consistent napper, and this helps me refuel. I’ve also definitely had to rearrange my life as an introvert parent–I could never be doing my former job as a middle school teacher while also parenting. Being an introvert is an added dimension to parenting, for sure!
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Teaching really does take a whole chunk of my energy for the day… But I also know that, for me, I’m happier when I’m doing it. 🙂 how do you get your “air” as a fellow introvert?
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Yes, I love teaching too. I just couldn’t do 150 middle school kids a day anymore! I teach grad school now and love walking my dog alone for some introvert time 🙂
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